Hello, August: I'm Catching Back Up

July ended up being a busy month, so I can’t say we took a relaxing, peaceful break last month. But I admit I’ve missed the practice of regularly blogging. Allow me to do a little catch up:

On the personal side

We kept my nephew for July 4^th weekend. 

We’ve been to two different lakes with various family last month. 

We celebrated my mom’s birthday and Howell’s grandmother’s 90^th birthday. 

And we went to NYC with our best friends.

What a great month for spending time with others! We are continually blessed by the people God has placed in our lives.

On the writing side

I entered several contests this summer, so I’m hoping to hear something on those soon. I’ve also revised my manuscript like crazy, especially the first half. The critique group I joined has greatly blessed me, and I received feedback from another writer-friend who swapped manuscripts with me. Both opportunities have allowed me to make some changes that (hopefully!) strengthen the manuscript.

I am waiting on an agent-hopeful, and in the meantime, I’m thinking of setting this manuscript aside and focusing on another story God has put on my heart. I’m in the process of outlining it now, and since I’m shooting for the shorter side on this one (maybe 40,000 words), I’m hoping I can finish it this year.

August is like January for us teacher-folks, and I always love the renewed sense of purpose I get at the start of every school year. I anticipate good things to come.

The Lord continues to woo me closer, drawing me in where I can see His Daddy heart. I’m reminded of His goodness, of His perfect plan.

“The Lord is good and what He does is good.” Psalm 119:68

“For the Lord is a shield and a sun. He bestows honor and favor. No good thing does He withhold from those who walk uprightly.” Psalm 84:11

“The Lord will perfect that which concerns me.” Psalm 138:8

Whether this month feels like a new start or a halfway point in the year for you, I pray you’ll take deep breaths today and allow the Lord to love on you with His goodness. 

Happy Anniversary to Us!

Tomorrow, we will celebrate eight years of incredible marriage. It’s funny how in many ways it has flown by, yet I feel as though we have been married forever. Eight years went by in a blink and at the same time helped create a bond between two people that is tight beyond what I knew was possible.

I still remember the first day that I met Laura, even though she doesn’t. :P I thought, wow, she is beautiful. She really might be the one I’ve been looking for. I’ve never been one of those people that believe there is only one person out there for everyone, but I do know for a fact that God created us for each other in many ways. 

You see, a few months before we met, I asked my dad “How do I know when I’ve found a person who I can marry?” He said that I need to be confident in what I was looking for before I could be sure when I found it. Wise words, as usual, from him. I made a list with 17 qualities, ranging from spiritual to physical to personality and prayed over it. The night I met her, I started checking them off, and it didn’t take long before they were all checked, and I was falling fast in love. It took her a little longer to get there, but we have been mad about each other ever since.

We’ve been through good and bad times, made huge mistakes and great decisions. In eight short years (knowing each other ten), we have formed a friendship and a marriage bond that is deeper than I could’ve imagined. Every night, when I pray for her before bed, I thank God for Laura and for putting us together. When I think He might be holding out on us, or I have some unanswered prayer, I’m reminded of the life that He has given the two us, and I have no doubt that He is good.

This is supposed to be a fun post, and I’ve gotten deep and emotional. So, to lighten the mood, I’ll let you on a little inside joke about our eighth anniversary. Laura is always the one of us who remembers things. She can probably tell you what we ate last week for dinner and what is on her calendar for ten days from now. For some reason though, our sixth anniversary became our eighth in her mind. Nearing our anniversary, people would ask how many years we had been married. The answer was repeatedly eight. 

Now, I’m not always sure of my memory, but I was very sure once I counted on my fingers that that was not our eighth anniversary. When I asked about it, she was embarrassed, but we had a good laugh. And then she said “It just seems like we’ve been married so long!” So I said, “Well I guess time flies when you’re having fun.” Since then, it’s been a running joke that we will always have been married eight years. Now it’s true!

We are so blessed to share the little bit of wisdom we’ve gained from the Lord in our marriage. It is an honor and a privilege. We look forward to many more wonderful years of marriage and hopefully, passing that on to you.

~Howell

@G2WHubs

Why Vacations Matter

This post was originally published here, on the HCF Blog, Among Women.

Summers were made for vacation, right?

Over on the HCF blog, Jodie Leigh shared great tips for traveling, especially with littles. Being prepared—mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually—is certainly key.

If you’re thinking: “We can’t travel anywhere! We don’t have any money! There’s no time!” my answer to you is this: Make it a priority; it’s worth it!

Vacations offer us a new perspective, rest for our soul, and the opportunity to make memories with our loved ones.

I don’t know why we have to leave town to get that kind of transformation, but we just do.

If you don’t think you have money to spend on vacation, consider this, you’re likely paying for a data plan on a smart phone, a Netflix account and internet, or a cable account—or some combination of all the above.

I’m not suggesting you cancel your cable and take a trip, but we pay for whatever we prioritize.

Howell and I didn’t have a lot of “extra” in our finances during our first few years of marriage, but we were raised in households that vacationed at least once a year. It didn’t have to be anywhere fancy—but getting out of town was a common practice we wanted to continue.

There are plenty of opportunities for vacationing that won’t break the bank:

•           Go somewhere close
•           Stay at hotels or motels that include breakfast
•           Pack lunches
•           Choose cheap entertainment opportunities

The biggest advice I would offer is to plan and save. Sometimes we have a place picked out where we know we want to go, and sometimes we just start to save—putting a few hundred dollars back each month. When we have X amount, we start “shopping” around: Where can we go that includes hotel, gas or flights, meals, etc. for this amount?

We’ve traveled to many great places (London, San Diego, Colorado, the Caribbean—and all over Texas, New Mexico, and Oklahoma, of course!), but the trip with some of our best memories may very well be one of our cheapest vacations.

We went to Fort Davis in our first or second year of marriage. We drove about six hours in the car, so gas was fairly minimal, and we stayed somewhere cheap (but nice enough to include breakfast J). Our entertainment included a lot of free things—touring Fort Davis, hiking outside of Fort Davis, hiking Enchanted Rock, and walking around the shops in town.

We have several funny (and some embarrassing) memories from that trip, and I bet the whole weekend didn’t cost more than $300.

If you plan well and manage expectations (as Jodie suggested), then vacations give us a wonderful opportunity to let go of stress, forget about work and the laundry, and make memories with our family.

Your kids may or may not remember the $100 you spend on their shoes or jeans, but they will remember that time you went to six flags and ate turkey legs together.

Yes, it’s an investment. Yes, it’s time away from work and other responsibilities (and may require that you delegate). But it’s worth it!

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Weeding Out the Gardens of Our Heart

About a month ago, I spent several hours pulling weeds from our flowerbeds. It hasn’t been that long since my last efforts—really. But this week, I noticed it’s that time again.

I grumbled a little, mumbling something about why couldn’t the weeds stay out of the beds for the rest of the summer. Mumbling a little more about how much effort I had already put into these beds.

But in the midst of my bad attitude, the Lord spoke to my heart about a spiritual principle.

You see, sometimes I want to work on the weeds in the garden of my heart just once—and then I want to pretend the rest of the time that nothing ever creeps back in.

But I’m told to guard my heart above all else.

Why?

Because it’s the place from which I do life—where I feel, where I make decisions, where I act and react.

If you’ve ever read a Danny Silk book, you know he’s all about the heart. His favorite question to ask is “How’s your heart?”

As I’ve learned more and more to be real with my Heavenly Dad, to let him see my heart and all of me, I’ve learned I have to ask the hard questions, like “How’s my heart today?”

If I neglect that question, maybe it’s okay for a day or two. But if I let a whole week go by, there’s likely something growing in there, and it’s not a pretty flower.

Weeds are ugly little things, and they look like unrest, impatience, offense, frustration, control, fear, self-pity, self-doubt.

I’m not much of a gardener, but I know a few things. One is that you can’t just pull the head of the weed out of the garden.

You have to get to the root.

I also know that even when you purge a flowerbed from weeds, there’s a good chance more will be back eventually. (Thus my grumblings this week…)

Let me tell you friends, picking weeds is not glamorous; it's a chore. And it often takes a while to really dig in and get those flowerbeds cleaned out. 

You'll get your hands dirty. 

You might be a little sore. 

However, God has promised that we have everything we need for life and godliness.

We’re also given his Holy Spirit, who is our helper and friend. The fruits of His Spirit are like Round Up to the flowerbeds of our heart.

But only when wet let him come in and take over, only when we let our hearts be filled with His Spirit.

And if you’re a farmer or a gardener, you know, even once with Round Up only lasts for a season.

That’s why Ephesians says we have to “Be filled with the Spirit.” The aspect of the verb there means “Be continuously being filled.”

How’s your heart today, my friend? Do you have some weeds to pull? Need some Holy Spirit Round Up?

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When Selling a Bed Becomes a Lesson in Patience

This weekend, I experienced my first attempt at selling something through an online Facebook garage sale page. I posted an extra full-sized wrought iron bed we needed to get rid of, and within ten minutes, I had more than one offer.

The first offers that came in were for slightly less than my asking price. Not by much—but a little less. I debated for two hours—literally—whether to settle or wait.

My husband, who is always the voice of reason, calmly shrugged and said, “Babe, it’s been like an hour. Just wait and see what you have tomorrow.”

Good advice, right?

Yeah… But I’m impatient, and sometimes everything feels urgent—even when it’s not an urgent thing at all.

I waited a little longer (and by little, I mean maybe 30 more minutes). Then I accepted the first person who offered, albeit at a reduced priced.

Of course, not 15 minutes after I settled, I had three more offers—for full price. By the time I went to bed, I was getting messages from two different people, begging for the bed. (I’m not even joking!) By the next morning (not even 24 hours later), I had 14 offers on it.

But I felt like I had to honor my original ‘Yes,’ and on Tuesday, an excited single-mom came and picked up the bed and mattresses.

I knew I did the right thing, but I also felt a little miffed. If only I had waited…

I don’t write this to self-deprecate or condemn myself, but the truth is, I wonder sometimes whether I rob myself of God’s fullest blessings because I get impatient.

I’m reminded of the old sermon story of the boy who throws a fit in Walmart, begging for the $150 bike. His parents hold their ground and seem like the worst parents ever—except that they already bought him a $300 bike for his birthday next week.

They know what he doesn’t know.

God always knows, too.

If I had a spiritual resume of my greatest traits and qualities, patience would not be on it. Intercessor, maybe. Worshiper, Giver—sure.

But patient, submitted, willing to release control—nope. None of those.

I know God’s not mad at me—nor does he punish me or withhold blessing from me. He’s a good Father, and He probably spends a lot of time whispering, “Hey, dear, I have a better blessing for you if you’ll wait it out.”

I’m not trying to over-spiritualize here either. It’s just as possible that God’s best plan was for the single-mom to get the bed at the reduced rate. Maybe my impatience wasn’t about me; maybe it was always about her blessing.

But either way, I’m reminded this week that I need to surrender control, be patient, let go of those things that really aren’t urgent (which, by the way, is pretty much everything!), and submit my heart to my Father’s heart.

If I can just slow down, just for a second, I might hear Him whisper.

Friends, do any of you struggle with that impatient spirit—where everything feels urgent? Do you struggle to wait on God’s timing?

I’d love to hear any advice you have to offer! 

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