Monday, March 13, 2017

Five Things I Wish I Had Known as a Newlywed - Part Two

Last time, Laura shared five things that she wished she knew in our first year of marriage. Today, I’m going to do the same. I always love these types of things, and I’m thankful for the people that have shared wisdom like this with me.

1.       You are going to disagree. In all my time growing up, I never saw my parents argue. That is no slight against them; they made a decision to disagree in private. I had this idea, though, that healthy couples never fight. That is far from the truth. All couples argue, to varying degrees. The real mark of a healthy couple is how they disagree.

2.       The work of marriage is the fun part. What? Work is fun? Many people told me that great marriages take work. What I’ve found is, the work is the best part. I love doing things for Laura, listening to her, and spending time together. I wish I had known that that was the work, earlier.

3.       Listen, don’t talk. I had plenty of warning on this, but I didn’t listen. Men, you do not need to fix every problem, and she only wants your advice when she solicits it. Just hear her out, offer sympathy and hug her. If she wants advice, she’ll ask.

4.       I’m the compassionate leader. This was a tough one, and I’m always reinforcing it to myself. It is difficult to balance leading in every area of marriage while also making sure your wife is heard. Some men defer every decision, and some men are not interested in their wife’s thoughts on matters, but every man struggles with this. The best answer is Christ. Paul answers this very well in Ephesians 5.

5.       Listen to the Lord. When we got married, I was the lone ranger on every matter of marriage. When I learned to be free in Christ and trust the Lord, I became twice the husband that I used to be. This was a huge help with number 4.

Well folks, there you have it. I hope this was beneficial for you. Marriage is hard. If it were easy, half of marriages wouldn’t fail. For those of you who are new to it, hear me say this. IT’S WORTH IT! Laura is the best thing that has happened to me since Jesus, and I wouldn’t trade a single minute of this incredible journey. Stick with it and be open to learn and change. Arguments and feelings will come and go, but Christ will always be there for both of you.


No comments: