Last time, Laura shared five things that she wished she knew in our first year of marriage. Today, I’m going to do the same. I always love
these types of things, and I’m thankful for the people that have shared wisdom
like this with me.
1.
You are
going to disagree. In all my time growing up, I never saw my parents argue.
That is no slight against them; they made a decision to disagree in private. I
had this idea, though, that healthy couples never fight. That is far from the
truth. All couples argue, to varying degrees. The real mark of a healthy couple
is how they disagree.
2.
The work
of marriage is the fun part. What? Work is fun? Many people told me that
great marriages take work. What I’ve found is, the work is the best part. I
love doing things for Laura, listening to her, and spending time together. I
wish I had known that that was the work, earlier.
3.
Listen,
don’t talk. I had plenty of warning on this, but I didn’t listen. Men, you
do not need to fix every problem, and she only wants your advice when she solicits
it. Just hear her out, offer sympathy and hug her. If she wants advice, she’ll
ask.
4.
I’m the
compassionate leader. This was a tough one, and I’m always reinforcing it
to myself. It is difficult to balance leading in every area of marriage while
also making sure your wife is heard. Some men defer every decision, and some men
are not interested in their wife’s thoughts on matters, but every man struggles
with this. The best answer is Christ. Paul answers this very well in Ephesians
5.
5.
Listen to
the Lord. When we got married, I was the lone ranger on every matter of
marriage. When I learned to be free in Christ and trust the Lord, I became
twice the husband that I used to be. This was a huge help with number 4.
Well folks, there you have it. I hope this was beneficial
for you. Marriage is hard. If it were easy, half of marriages wouldn’t fail.
For those of you who are new to it, hear me say this. IT’S WORTH IT! Laura is
the best thing that has happened to me since Jesus, and I wouldn’t trade a
single minute of this incredible journey. Stick with it and be open to learn
and change. Arguments and feelings will come and go, but Christ will always be
there for both of you.
~Howell
@G2WHubs
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